Moment of Weakness
When the 1st needle was poked into my hand, it turned chill immediately. When the 2nd needle went in, I wanted to scream. By the time the 3rd needle went in, my tears were about to roll down my cheeks.
Fought hard to overcome the pain. Refused to give in. I will not lose this fight. Was ok in the end. Chatted a bit with the sinseh. Hand hurt after that but it will be fine. I will be fine. I hope.. I have to be.
Last nite was bad. I cried. I didn't mean to but bones were aching, nose was blocked, throat was dry and scratchy. It was bad. I felt real sick and for that split second, lonely. But I didn't succumb to temptation. I teared for a minute or so and I told myself that I will be fine. That I didn't need anyone to look after me. Told myself to have nerves of steel, grit my teeth and live thro this. I have to. I know I have to.
Tears stopped after that. I chided myself for being weak. I shouldn't be like that. I am not someone who needs a man all the time. I can be by myself. I can look after myself. I will be strong. Focus on career and all will be fine.
Roy wanna do his Masters. I wanna do mine too. We're gonna check it out and maybe do it together so that we can partner each other to study. Time to channel my energy somewhere else instead of thinking about crap stuff and feeling sorry for myself. It is my life that I have to live. This is my life.
And this, is me. The stubborn girl who will not give in easily.
Fought hard to overcome the pain. Refused to give in. I will not lose this fight. Was ok in the end. Chatted a bit with the sinseh. Hand hurt after that but it will be fine. I will be fine. I hope.. I have to be.
Last nite was bad. I cried. I didn't mean to but bones were aching, nose was blocked, throat was dry and scratchy. It was bad. I felt real sick and for that split second, lonely. But I didn't succumb to temptation. I teared for a minute or so and I told myself that I will be fine. That I didn't need anyone to look after me. Told myself to have nerves of steel, grit my teeth and live thro this. I have to. I know I have to.
Tears stopped after that. I chided myself for being weak. I shouldn't be like that. I am not someone who needs a man all the time. I can be by myself. I can look after myself. I will be strong. Focus on career and all will be fine.
Roy wanna do his Masters. I wanna do mine too. We're gonna check it out and maybe do it together so that we can partner each other to study. Time to channel my energy somewhere else instead of thinking about crap stuff and feeling sorry for myself. It is my life that I have to live. This is my life.
And this, is me. The stubborn girl who will not give in easily.
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