Saturday, April 23, 2005
the war against my company
i think it's obvious to a lot of people that i wanna leave this dumb audit company that i'm in. i've wanted to resign since the 1st week i started work n i told my boss, mr quek, about it. he insisted that i stay to help n to try things out, n that he'll lemme go if i really don't like it. well, of coz i take his word for it. but now, i'm being cheated n accused of wanting to leave by the audit manager or whatever his fucking post is. talked to them on fri n below is how the conversation between me n that man, mr khaw, went.
mr khaw: maggie, come in..
me (walked in n took a seat without saying a word): ...
mr khaw: heard from mr quek that u want to leave. why must u give us this sort of trouble now? don't u know that it's very hard for us to look for people who want to work in the financial sector now? n your letter of employment states that u r supposed to give 6 months notice if u were to leave in the 1st 6 months.. don't tell me u don't know that?
me (feeling pissed off): i know..
mr khaw: then why do u still want to leave?
me: coz i don't like auditing..
mr khaw: but u could have waited til aug before resigning can't u? then u only need to give 1 month notice. can't u tell the employer at the other end to wait 3 months for u?
me: no i can't.
mr khaw: do u know that u have to pay the 5.5 months for the breach in the contract?
me: i was thinking that i've worked here for 4 months now so i can jus pay 1.5 month.
mr khaw: no.. coz the 5.5 months is for the ungiven notice period.
me (totally forgot that i had wanted to resign in january): so there's nothing i can do?
mr khaw: u either wait 3 months or u pay $8,250 for the 5.5 months. after the 3 months, i can introduce u to my associates at HSBC bank or xxx (forgot what the other bank's name is) bank.
me (thinking to myself *not like u can guarantee me a job.. talk is cheap*): i'll need to talk to my family first.
mr khaw: u know why i'm doing this right? i can't afford to not let u pay coz the rest will be wondering why there's a double standard. n if i let u off, they'll all want the same thing. then this company will collapse.
me (thinking to myself *not like i care if your bloody company collapses or not.. i do wish that it does collapse coz u guy suck.. money suckers... bloody idiots*): i know.
mr khaw: i don't understand why u got to leave. why can't u wait? i've cut down the terms to 1st 3 months of work, 3 months notice must be given to resign but it's already so hard to employ someone with experience. n now, u have to create this sort of trouble.
me (thinking to myself *who ever will be so dumb to accept this sort of freaking ridiculous terms except me coz i'm a fresh grad*): ....
mr khaw: when did u go for an interview anyway? n knowing that u have this sort of terms in your letter of employment..
me (thinking to myself *ya.. of coz i know i have this sort of stupid terms*): 1 or 2 months ago.
mr khaw: n u knew that u had this sort of terms in your letter of employment right? coz if not, i'll think that u are very naive. does your other employer know?
me: ya.. i know i have this term in my letter. n ya.. they know it too.
mr khaw: then y don't u try asking them to pay for half the amount? then u won't have to pay so much. it's not a small sum u know? even i feel heart pain at the amount that u have to pay.
me (thinking to myself *ya right.. don't pretend.. u jus want the money. stop being such a hypocrite*): i don't know.
mr khaw: why don't u try talking to them first? maybe they can wait or they're willing to pay?why not u jus wait another 3 more months before leaving?
me (thinking to myself *i wouldn't want to work here for another second more coz i can't stand seeing your face nor any of the management's face coz u guys totally SUCK BIG TIME): i need to talk to my family first..
n the conversation repeats for the next 1 hour or so if i'm not wrong. BUT I WON'T BE DEFEATED WITHOUT PUTTING ON A FIGHT!! monday, i'll talk to mr quek n tell him," i wanted to resign in january but u didn't accept. if u had accepted, i wouldn't have to pay the extra 4 months now. now i have to pay extra n it's not even my fault. n u neglected to tell mr khaw this which is why he is accusing me now. it's time u do your freaking part n help me bargain to pay for only 1.5 month."
YES, I'M GOING TO BE FIRM AND FIERCE THIS TIME. NO MORE GIVING IN. I'M SICK OF BEING THE NICE PERSON I M N BEING BULLIED BY THESE PEOPLE. I'M GONNA FIGHT THIS WAR. WHETHER I WIN OR LOSE, IT DOESN'T MATTER. AT LEAST I GAVE IT A SHOT N I'VE TRIED MY BEST.
there are many people behind me especially my colleagues now coz what happens to me will affect them in future. they, too, have their contracts but it's better for them coz they're foreigners. they can always go back to their countries. i can't. i need to fight this war n hopefully win. wanna thank thank all of them for standing by my side in this war, especially adelene, huiwen n jessica. n also to irene, fittor, hendry, chin choong n seaway. wanna thank my other friends too.. for their support n encouragement - edmund, wayne, n of coz to my very wonderful n supportive family especially my aunts, uncle, ann, jacqueline, my sis, n my bf. they have been behind me all this while n are willing to pay if need be. i won't disappoint them.
I'LL BE STRONG N I HOPE TO WIN THIS WAR!!!!!!! I'LL BE BRAVE N FIGHT ON TIL MY VERY LAST DAY AT THIS SICKENING PLACE!! HOPE IS NOT LOST YET!! I'LL DEFINITELY WAIT FOR THE MIRACLE TO HAPPEN!!
whoever wants to show me their support can always email me at
maggie_31@hotmail.com or
chenmeiqi@yahoo.com or sms me or leave a message at the tag board. hehe. :) i need lots of it! haha. wish me luck people.
*hell hath no fury like a woman scorned*
magz [10:17 PM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
Sunday, April 17, 2005
feelings..
jus finished watching the national kidney foundation (nkf) show on tv just now. i always cry when i watch that show coz i see the patients suffering and i feel very sad. for years, when i watch the stories of the patients, 1 thought always cross my mind.
the same thought is.. what will happen if 1 of them is me? i've always felt that i'll never be able to live long. i still feel that. i've never wanted to live for long anyway. i've always done things that i don't regret so even if i were to die right now, i won't regret anything. i've lived my life to the fullest for 22 years and i've been happy. i have no fear of dying. the only thing is.. i don't want to suffer before i can die.. i don't want to die coz i have an illness. sudden death is ok.. such as accidents or whatnots.. but no diseases and illnesses.
but what if i have some illness or disease that requires long term taking care of? i've always wondered.. if i were married and i have some illness, will my husband take care of me and still love me? i'm not sure about that. i've always had doubts. but honestly, i don't want to be a burden to anyone. i think, even if i were to have some serious illness, i won't tell anyone and i will definitely ask for a break up or a divorce.
i know lots of people will say that it's not the right thing to do.. but somehow, that's how i feel. today, there was a story on this old lady who had kidney problems. her 70 year old hubby was still by her side supporting and encouraging her. i was so touched that i cried. so many of the featured stories about this people really touched my heart with their love, care and support for each other. will i be able to do that or have that sort of fortune? i'm not sure but i'll push it away.. i yearn for it yet i hate to be a burden. i'm so ironic.
what do i acutally want? sigh.. i am not sure myself.
n tomorrow, i have to talk to my boss about resigning. i hate to disappoint him but i've got no choice. he's not young and it's the busy season but i hope he'll let me off.. i'll owe him big time if he does.. hopefully.. hope he's big-hearted enough.. cross my fingers..
magz [11:47 PM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
Friday, April 15, 2005
convocation~
this week has passed rather quickly i must say. probably coz i wsn't in the office much.
on monday and tuesday of this week, i was at desker road for audit. well, the place wasn't as bad as i thought but there are definitely more men than women along the whole road. can easily get disturbed by the men but was ok coz i only came ot to havae lunch and it was with the accountant. had acutally finished what i needed to do on monday there but knew that boss won't let me back in office til thursday so i had to head back to desker on tuesday. was a bit bored so wrote my dearest boyfriend a letter/note on 100 reasons/things that i like about him. haha.
tried to sneak back to the office on tuesday evening but my boss was around til 6.30pm!! had to hide at coffee bean down the street with nothing to do at all. read a magazine that they provided there n pretty much people-watch til i was so desperate to relieve my bladder. coffee bean's toilet was being cleaned at that time and i couldn't bear with it anymore so i sneaked back to my office to use the toilet and hid at the back of the office and chatted with the colleagues there. hehe.
concentrated on doing my stuff on wednesday though i was supposed to be at desker road. didn't want to waste my time there so i sneaked back to office knowing that my boss wouldn't be in the office. hehe. thursday came. i was late for work by 10 mins. haha. was too excited to do anything in the office coz i applied for leave to attend my convocation on friday. anne came to look for me at 11am to collect her gown and we chatted downstairs til 11.30am, after my big boss and 2nd boss had seen me chatting downstairs instead of working. haha. couldn't really be bothered coz i'll be heading over to join anne soon anyway.
called jean after that to chat on the phone til 12.45pm where i headed to dbs for lunch with my ex-colleagues. went back to the office at 2.10pm - late again! :) checked some personal stuff online n did a bit of work but wasn't concentrating much. played some games followed by chatting with colleagues and some photo taking. haha.
n today came! my convocation!! i have officially graduated and can call myself a graduate - finally!!!! haha. been waiting for this day for ages. the only sad thing was, i didn't bring grandma along. but i'll take photos with her tomorrow at my aunt's place. think she'll be happy but at the same time, i know she'll cry. :p the irony of life. haha.
anyway, mel's digicam died on me after i had taken only a few shots n the memory card was full. quite sad. managed to get friends to help me take photos n i'll ask them to email the pics back to me. introduced my family to tom's family after we've been together for 1 year plus. hehe.
went for lunch with tom's parents after i had taken photos with most of my close friends. headed to copthorne orchid for lunch. tom's dad asked where my dad went coz they had actually wanted to invite him for lunch as well. anyway, the food was wonderful!! i had buddha jump over the wall, seafood roll, crabmeat paste with vegetables, ee-fu noodles, ostrich meat and honeydew sago. everything was delicious!!! was really a fantastic lunch~!
i remember someone asked me before for the ingredients for buddha jump over the wall. here they are - abalone, shark's fin, sea cucumber, mushroom (dong gu), dried scallops, fish maw, n chinese herbs namely gou qi zi, huai shan, n dang gui. most importantly, of coz there is the soup - chicken broth.
after all that food, i have taken a nap n here i am, wide awake.. waiting for my click of people to lemme know the plans for tonite but seems like nobody has got any clue on what's happening. will just have to wait n c.. n i'll be waiting~~~~~
somebody jus lemme know soon!!!!!!!!!!
magz [5:53 PM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
Saturday, April 09, 2005
saturday morning~
think close friends will be wondering.. what in the world is maggie up n about so early on a weekend morning? haha. that's right. i never wake up before noon on saturdays and sundays unless it's necessary. no choice. i can't finish my work n i'll be out of office on monday n tuesday so i had to drag myself out of bed to come back to office to finish up my stuff. i actually thought that it would be quite boring, but on the bright side, bosses are not around so we get to listen to music real loud!! blast the music n not get scolded. haha. that makes me feel better~
haven't seen the dbs gals for the past week. no email nor msg from them. i can understand. they're busy. i'm busy too. have been trying hard to finish up this set of accounts but they r real messy. finishing up soon. thank god! then i'll be out to audit for 2 days n come back with loads to do again. sighz~ work is really never-ending. to the dbs gals, take care of yourselves. u gals fall sick so easily. drink more water n remember to get more rest.
went to jean's place last nite with tom again. hehe. to help her de-stress from exams preparation and to catch up on life. of coz, it's a chance for me to spend quality time with my boy. hehe. glad to hear that she's doing fine with dilun and that stef n jason r ok too! happy for my 2 great gal friends. :) talked quite a bit til 10pm where i rushed home to watch 'survivor'. as usual, me and my tv. haha. but i enjoyed the nite, spending it with a great friend and my boyfriend as well. :p
so here i am, early in the morning in the office. will leave at about 1pm to head to dbs to look for my sis n wait for tom to pick me up. afterwhich, we will head to seng kang for his hair cut and then, i have no idea. i wanna go to so many places. probably chinatown to buy stuff. i know that he wants to go to parkway parade to look for some stuff tonite as well and i've agreed to go as well. will see how things go.
friday's convocation~! can't wait coz i don't have to work. haha. took 1 day leave to rest n relax, and to enjoy my weekend. hehe. ^_^
magz [10:18 AM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
in a long while..
i'm a happy girl today~! it's been a long while since tom said that he misses me n that he really wanted to do something with. :p we had actually agreed to meet for lunch today but he was informed by his colleague at the last minute that their boss would be treating them to lunch. he was upset and said that he would rather lunch with me instead and that he missed me. it's been so long since he missed me more than i missed him. :) felt a bit happy then.
in the end, he decided to try n ask his boss if he could come out for a while after lunch so that he could meet me. his boss agreed n he bought black forest ice blended from coffee bean for me n some peppermint leaves for me to try. felt so touched by the small action taken by him. it was so sweet of him to purposely walk over to my office after lunch jus to meet me for that few minutes and to get me a drink as well. it really brightened my day and jus made me a happy girl! thanx dear~
1 sad thing though.. i'm supposed to make my way to desker road next monday to audit a client's accounts. of all places, DESKER ROAD!!!!! told my dad to send me there and he asked me if i know what kind of a place that is. i mean, hey!!! i stay in singapore. of coz i know what kind of place that is. but i can't possibly tell my boss that i don't want to go coz it's at that road right? i'm the only staff under him. if i don't go, who else is supposed to go?? n i won't be able to meet my budget if i don't go for this job.
sigh.. i haven't got much of a choice. my boss told me to be there for about 3 days to do the job but i'm thinking of cutting it to 1 or 2 days. can't stand being at that sort of place for so long. would rather do the stuff in office where i can have the computer, the phone and my own table at my disposal. not forgetting, the music and the mp3s. i don't want to be there!!
dunno whether i want next week to come quickly or not. heard from jessica that i can do it in 1 day but not sure what my boss will say if i go back office so fast. will try to finish up everything there in 1 day or at most 2 days. my boss doesn't come to office on wednesdays coz he'll be at another company doing consultation work so i can sneak back to office on wednesday without him knowing. haha. will see what i can do. but i'll dread the 2 days that i'm there.
k.. time for me to focus and concentrate on watching 'amazing race'. :p i know what close friends will say.. 'u and your tv'. haha.
magz [9:47 PM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
Sunday, April 03, 2005
enjoyable weekend~
went for dinner with the dbs gals on fri nite after work. felt like some sort of well-deserved break for all o f us i guess, coz we've been working ot for the past week though we're working at different places. went for dinner at liang seah st. can't remember what the restaurant's name is but their chicken wings are not bad. think anne will love them if i bring her there. haha. anyway, the food there was ok but the waiting time was way too long. we talked and laughed a lot, making lots of jokes and catching up with news at dbs. haven't laughed that much for a long time now. haha.
after dinner, we decided that the nite was still young coz for once, jessie didn't need to rush home and ivy was with us. what was wasted was that rachel's husband picked her up before she could join us for karaoke. we sang karaoke from 11pm to 3am. was great fun except for some disgusting guy who kept looking into our room and trying to get our attention. nevertheless, we enjoyed ourselves a lot. 1st time i heard mel sing. she sounds so cute!!! so girly!! hehe. think guys will fall head over heels with her if they hear her sing. hehe. :p
was so tired when i reached home coz i had headache in the afternoon. thanks to jessica for a fantastic massage that i was able to enjoy myself til 3am. thanks girl!!! fell asleep immediately after i've settled down. woke up only at 1.30pm when dad came home. haha. bathed and tom reached my place right after i'm prepared. had lunch together and went to pick sis up at her place.
went to funan to collect my dvd player and had coffee bean coz i was still too sleepy. whipped cream taste as good as ever!!! haha. wish i can eat the whole can of whipped cream. :) sis kept saying that i'm gonna grow fat from all that cream. i don't care. haha. i enjoy it and i love eating it~
after which, we went to creative district.. a shop at clarke quay area to collect our graduation gowns. sis paid for my photo to be taken when i go on stage n shake hands with the dean. haha. it comes with the frame and costs $60 which she paid in full. thanks dearest sis~! :) went to plaza singapura to watch 'the eye 10' where we had our dinner at mos burger 1st. sis treated us so thanks once again~! hehe. the show was supposed to be a ghost show but i ended up laughing most of the time. haha.
sent sis home and i went to tom's place coz he wanted to show his liverpool match on tv. i used the computer to surf the net and friendster. realised that quite a lot of my friends are attached now. wow!!! congrats to all of them and may their relationship stay strong~! :)
fell asleep for a while after i finished using the computer. tom sent me home at 1.30am. came home and couldn't sleep. used the computer til about 3am and went to lie down. still couldn't sleep so i tossed and turned til about 4+. woke up at 1pm again this morning. haha. feels good to be able to wake up in the afternoon.
waiting for my laundry to be done and i can hit the sack once again. got to wake up early tomorrow morning coz my cousin, ann, has a new job at suntec and i'm following her car to work to see if it's more convenient for me. k.. gotta concentrate on talking to tom on the phone for now. nite nitez!
magz [11:10 PM]
*will dreams come true one day?*
