When I Dream~

At a gathering with the usual ex colleagues gang of KK, Goldie and Justin. Somehow the topics were all involving money, pay, condos and cars. A very materialistic conversation the whole night. And also the immense pressure by my brothers on me to change jobs. Which led me thinking back to the conversation I had with Ky today - materialistic gains or fulfillment in life. I'm no longer sure which direction I'm heading towards. I mean, of coz I would like to be more decently paid for the amount of work I do (I am the lowest paid amongst all my ex colleagues despite being in middle office whereas some are still in operations). I don't think I'm asking for too much but 5 years of being stagnant in terms of pay and ranking is bound to make any normal person unhappy and unsatisfied. And that's where I am right now. Then comes fulfillment - does it come with a condo, a car, more money? The fulfillment Ky and I were talking about is actually on how we can contribute to t...

Quick update before I head off to dreamland. Been feeling kinda down from work lately as I feel that my Singapore team lead has something against me. Hasn't been a good year thus far but hasn't been all that bad as well. So what happened to make me really displeased today was that on Monday, we had new China management associate (MA) who joined our desk. My team lead, N, introduced him to all the other team members except me. Today, we had a new big boss joining us on the floor. Again, the introductions did not come to me. Even the sales guy who was sitting next to us was introduced to the boss and this sales guy is totally irrelevant to the team! Whereas I was totally neglected again. It just makes me feel like I'm not part of the team and definitely feel that I'm very out of place and redundant to the team. :( So there I was, pouring my heart out to Eeyore and I felt so upset by such an act that I almost felt like crying. I held back the tears of coz. Why should I let...

Just spent an entire hour alone with the woman that I love, the woman who gave birth to a man who has passed away for 4 years now - a woman known as my gram. Told her many things, not that she knows or understands anymore but jus wanted to tell her. Like how I used to lie next to her in bed and talking to her about stuff. :) told her I'll be going to Hk this weekend and she actually repeated the words "hong kong"! Unbelievable! I think she misses her homeland.. I seriously should make a better effort at waking up early on Saturdays to visit my beloved gram. Gives me a sense of fulfillment and happiness. :) Something might happen soon. Currently I'm unsure and uncertain as yet. Keeping hopes and expectations low to avoid disappointment. :p Have a good weekend!