Caring..

Should I say I heard something about myself today? Wonder how I should describe it but anyway, I found out that I'm not as caring as I thought I am.

Maybe I'm just a bad friend. Haven't been contacting many friends in recent times and I haven't expressed as much concern as I should. Heard that it's the way I express myself. It's probably true. Been preoccupied with work so much that I even dreamt of work on Sunday night and again on Monday or Tuesday night (Can't remember the exact day). Am I stressed? Probably..

As I said, I've been contemplating if I should leave the bank. Our CCO dropped by today and I've always looked up to her coz to me, she's a very clever and talented woman. I know I can't compare myself with her but I always wish that I'm half as good and I'll be happy. Everytime I finish listening to her talks, I feel inspired and proud of my company. But after a while, the feeling simply goes away and I'm demoralised again. Guess it's coz I don't get enough encouragement and compliments for the hardwork I've put in.

And I seem to have neglected other people and their feelings by dedicating too much time and effort in my work. But to me, I wanna build my career while I still can when I'm still young. I don't wanna regret not being hardworking and not having a career when I'm older. So, maybe if I've neglected any of you or your feelings, I'm sorry...