Humpty Dumpty

I became Humpty Dumpty today. All thanks to the woman known as my sister and her part time cleaner. Hand washing clothes but not wringing them dry and just letting them drip freely in the balcony with no pails or rags underneath to contain/absorb the water. 

I had a slip previously due to that as well (a month or 2 ago) but managed to grab hold of the window grills to minimize the impact. And this time round, I fell all the way and hit the tail end of my spinal cord, my elbows and a bit of my head. If I ever become cripple or paralysed, I know who to blame. But as I fell and after the fall, I wondered and asked god... Why??? Why can't you just let me hit my head so hard that it bleeds and I die on the spot??? Or maybe just let me hit it so hard that I go into a coma again and just die from there??? 

I really see no point in living and esp more so than ever now. I'm just so so so so tired of it all. I can't take it much longer. I think I'm gonna go mad soon! Like my 2nd previous post.. I've got the feeling that something not good will happen or that I might just say goodbye forever. It's come true now but I'm still here and alive! That's not the correct outcome!! Pls... Pls just take me away for good....

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