No More Eeyore in the Office Again...

Had a horrible weekend, couldn't sleep well last night and went to work in a relatively bad mood. I peeped at Eeyore's desk as per usual again today.. Ever since we changed seats in office a few months back, he sits 2 rows in front of me and I can see his back when I peep through the throng of monitors. He was on leave last week and came back today. Last Friday would have been our 8th year anniversary if we were still together.. 16 Sep 2008... We started dating. I still tear whenever I think of that day.. :( 

Suddenly at 3+pm, when I was very busy as we had system outage for 1 hour plus and I was trying to rush all the backlog of work due to that, Harmanie pinged me on chat and told me "another one bites the dust". Somehow the minute I saw that line, I had a feeling it was Eeyore so I asked Harmanie who.. And I was correct.. My heart sank immediately and I peeped through the monitors and true enough, his desk was totally cleaned out and he was no longer there. A wave of emptiness swept over me. I didn't know what to think or how to feel anymore. All of a sudden, I just felt... Lost... We've been working in the same office since June 2010... And now... 
 
I dunno.. I no longer know. Tears rolling down my cheeks as I type this.. I had a feeling this might happen a few months ago.. Just didn't expect it to really come true.. I know I should take it as a closure of a chapter in my life and to finally move on. But it's really easier said than done.. Work is already getting shittier everyday, same for home life with her moving in for 2 months now.. Now even lesser of a motivation to go to work... 

Dunno what to think.. what to feel.. Damn confused and mixed up and messed up. Wish I can just sleep forever... 

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